okcupid, episode 27

“In the picture where you’re holding the baby, do you keep him in the cage behind you?”

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parking tickets

Dear University of Rochester,

Please stop emailing me every two weeks about my outstanding $50 parking ticket. I haven’t had a permit since 2009, which is when I got that ticket. I’m definitely not going to pay it, ever.

Sincerely,

Delinquent Dropout